Initially the bereaved person is likely to be in a state of shock and numbness, even when a death has been anticipated. Reactions vary greatly from very overt displays of emotion to displaying no emotion at all, appearing very controlled, calm and detached. This initial shock may last several days and usually allows the bereaved person to deal with all the necessary practicalities and cope with the funeral without losing control - a form of emotional protection.

It is very important that the bereaved person gradually accepts the reality of the death of this significant person in their life and that they can never return, in order to allow them to begin the task of adjustment. Some people may not immediately be able to talk about what has happened. Initially being able to see the dead person, being involved as much as possible in the preparations for the funeral, and observing rituals and traditions all assist people to face the reality of what has happened. Families from ethnic minorities may need support for the mourning rituals appropriate to their culture.